i wanna keep going with all of this so badly. i really hope it follows through. so people dont think im against anything good here. its just that slowly my hope is being shaved away. its sad isnt it. i know for a fact that i can do this for myself. its just that i dont wanna be in the situation where im not gonna want to. . . . . . . . . i never thought i would get to the point in my life where i would seriously drive myself crazy. what??? i wish everything was back to normal. - dingus